A Cemetery In The Borough

While houseguest #4 was in town, we took the first warm and sunny day to head over to Greenwood Cemetery. It’s twice the size of Prospect Park, and aside from groundskeepers (they were mulching and doing heavy machinery stuff in one section) and some obnoxious tourists who brought their screaming children to wake the dead - it was a lovely peaceful escape. We walked and walked and walked, for what seemed like hours - winding up and down hilly enclaves with 18th century (and 17th century) graves, newer ones mingled in. I kept using various stone angels as markers for what direction we were headed in, after circled around - then soon realized that their must be hundreds of the same angelic faces everywhere, covering the entire cemetery. We found ourselves at a pond, with a great view of the rolling hills of markers leading off into every direction. We had some fun with an egret (actually, it was something else lI have to ook it up)

And then after when we looked at the map we realized we had covered 1/10th of the grounds….making me remember their tag line..”Come for a visit, Stay for an eternity”. Shit if I can’t find my way out, I may just be doing that.

There are all kinds of famous people in the cemetery - and they do have some great tours - but mainly it is a beautiful respite from the city - maybe not as nice as wave hill or the Bronx botanical garden - but for in The Borough - it’s a place you should visit…but not stay an eternity -

Livin' In The Borough

I know it’s been a while since I managed to sit down and create a new entry. I keep thinking that this was supposed to be a way for me to develop my writing skills, and express my views - and increasingly it sounds more stilted and just plain bad. So what’s a girl to do? I can’t abandon the idea, but I’d better come up with some more interesting verbiage and perhaps try to clarify my voice.

Speaking of my voice, my voice it seems likes to rant quite a bit, and is definitely intolerant of other lifestyles other than my own. Hey it’s my blog - not like I’m coming into your living room and condemning your lifestyle. So here is where I issue the disclaimer If you don’t like it..write your own damn blog and fuck off. There I’ve said it proceed at your own risk.

It has been an increasingly hectic time in The Borough - between illnesses, houseguests (both good and bad), parties, weddings and heat waves..not to mention work, laundry and changing cat litter (which I seem to be doing all the frakkin’ time now). I’m in need of a vacation. Don’t laugh, I know I’ve been working for 6 months and already I’m tired of it. The getting up early, the dressing in clean clothes and most of all the commuting.

Commuting is one of those topics that everyone has a gripe about. You will never meet anyone show says - oh yeah getting to work is a breeze, it takes 10 minutes and it never stresses me out. And if you do meet that person - smack them, smack them hard until your hands are red. And then I’ll start smacking them for you. It’s gotten so bad I actually went to an anger management seminar.

Oh you caught that whole anger management thing did ya..well I secretly took a seminar (meaning I did not tell my mother). Why you may ask, mostly because of reasons that I cant go into right now - suffice to say that aside from the commuting anger (rail rage), I started having neighbor rage (anyone who has been to my house knows all about the retards living next door) - so angry going to work, coming home and then wanting to punch a hole in the wall and strangle them - is not conducive to a relaxed laid back lifestyle. I leave NY and within hours I’m a totally different person. So I decided I needed some skills to help manage this, no way to diffuse it entirely (I’m not moving anytime soon), but I needed to develop some coping mechanisms that would alleviate some of the stress and maybe even develop tolerance.

So that’s it, I’ll put up each of the other entries as time goes by - tell you a bit more about other things happening in and about The Borough….by the time you read this they will probably already be posted so maybe I can get back into the grooooove again.

Truth In The Borough

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/18/fashion/18slope.html?ref=style

Groovy Times in The Borough

Badges, we don’t need no stinking badges.

That’s the word of the day, groovy. Groovy times are here again, that’s really groovy. In the Groove. It’s only one of a number of outdated sayings I enjoy. Some of the others being “righteous”, “Big L”, and “sweet”.outdated and overused catechisms are an obvious way of being “dated” and I do find I’m not as up on the new sayings as I used to be. I mean I have found myself on occasion saying “where’s the beef” (and not referring to a flimsy burger).

Speaking of being dated, I had one of those experiences the other night that just made me want to jump up and down screaming “NO, NO, NO, NO”. Getting on the Lex heading back to The Borough, I catapulted myself to a seat (thereby pissing off a whole stream of people itching to sit down), and at the next stop the gi-normous woman sitting next to me got up effectively leaving two seats behind (and she had a neon pink raincoat on..not trying to blend in at all). A guy and his two friends (both female) eyed the seat - and without knowing that I COULD HEAR THEM they said:

Guy: “ hey there’s a seat there”
Girl #1“where?”
Girl #2 “next to that older woman”

OLDER WOMAN. WTF. I mean I still get carded at bars, and when I tell people I’m 30, without blinking, they don’t even question it! So I’m looking old this week. Maybe it’s the antibiotics or the lack of sleep, or both. Fuck. At least they didn’t say next to the “fat lady”, or the “ugly fat lady” or even worse the “pregnant woman”. Maybe it’s time to start dying my hair - I was so looking forward to just gradually going blonde (or white).

My new goal is to be the hot youngish woman on the train. To that effect, I will no longer be eating, since that’s about the only way the rolls of fat ever come off me (that and tropical sun and diving, which ain’t happening here for a while).

Groovy times are indeed here though - flowers blooming, tress dropping shitloads of pollen everywhere - spring is in the air ! The unseasonably cold and wet weather has put a slight delay on my continued exploration of the borough - but you can look forward to me telling you about greenwood cemetery, the return of Friday night fireworks at Coney, and a few other events in The Borough.

Meanwhile I’ll be sucking it in and hoping to meet a guy that is into “older” women.

Spring has Sprung In The Borough

Broken Gaydar in The Borough

Well, the glow of my 15 minutes of fame in and about The Borough have passed, and its back to the drudgery of the work week. I have no rant this week, which is especially good, since I keep saying I’m not going to turn this into a forum for my own negative feelings. Yeah me!

I have noticed something quite unusual. You may know I often title myself as a visionary of outsider art and the biggest fag-hag on the planet. I go to art events, group dinners and somehow I always end up picking up the gay guys. It is a strange phenomenon - always being the one who connects with the fabulous boys in swanky clothes, and as soon as I think I’ve figured it all out - my gaydar is on the fritz. 3 out of the 4 in the last month or two - I was totally wrong. Normally something like this would not really irk me, I mean so what, it’s not like they’re handing out awards for identifying sexual preference. However, all of my recent work on diversity - diversity best practices and being more tolerant and aware of the research and data on the subject - you would think I would be more finely tuned to these things.

In The Borough, for the most part it has always been easy to tell the hetero from homo crowd - though some of the younger guys most definitely have thrown a monkey wrench into that, being fashionistas and metro sexual. Your average metro sexual is causing havoc and throwing off the gaydar signals. The lines have blurred. And it not just cause they’re filled with smoke.

Aside from that - I’m hoping for a quiet week in The Borough, and a fast work week.

Native in The Borough

http://www.nypost.com/seven/04102008/entertainment/how_to_pass_for_a_native_new_yorker_105910.htm

I'm famous, for today. Just hoping this isn't my 15 minutes....